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Funny Pipes
Over the years on RFA’s the
piping system has been used to make some very important
pipes but here are a few of the ones which people may have
missed. circa. 1977 on RFA Tarbarness
Cadet at Gangway: Phew Phew (blowing into mic), Phew Phew ..
"d'yer hear there ... the liberty boat will be leaving in 5 minutes"
Ch Off Don Gay (from Bridge) : "d'yer hear there ... Cadets should
note that there is no need to pressurize the microphone before use"
sent in by Cheryl Noice
SE King to the flight deck.
Attention everyone! This is the
Captain, it has come to my attention that the piping system
has been used too much during silent hours. The piping
system should not be used during silent hours as this
interrupts the watch keepers sleep, I say again the piping
system should not be used during silent hours as this
interrupts the watch keepers sleep.( This pipe was made
during silent hours!)
Ted Rogers phone 321.
The early morning RAS has been
postponed by 2 hours, RAS teams will not be required now
until 5 o’clock. ( This pipe was made just after
midnight while everybody had their heads down for the 3 am
RAS.)
SG1 Picasso to the paint locker.
Many years ago while FOST was
still down in Portland, the following pipe was heard down
the MCR during a very long standby. “Duty watch muster at
the gangway. Shore leave has now been granted”. The bridge
was telephoned to find out what was going on and no one
answered the phone. Dispatched to find out what was
going on, three of the deck officers were observed going
down the gangway to a taxi for a 72. When I finally found
the duty officer “oh are you still on standby?”. Lets just
say that when the Chief found out he said a few words to say
that I can’t publish.
PO Tato contact the galley.
After arriving for a port visit
the following pipe was heard “While in port your are advised
not to go to the following tourist areas (red light)” a list
of place names and what landmarks they were near were read
out, ”maps with these areas marked on can be found in every
mess.” Red rag to a bull or what!
Fire Danger, Fire Danger, Fire
Danger, H2O leak on the flight deck no smoking throughout
the ship.
On RFA Resource in 1986 the following pipe was made. " D'ye hear there, d'ye hear there, shore telephone call for night nurse." At the time the SCO was Mike Nurse. Sent in by Rab Thomson Seaman Staines to the laundry. Sent in by Steve Oatey. Mr Black and Mr Decker, Dockyard drillers to the gangway.
A famous pipe from a certain QM when RFA Olwen was in Hobart Tasmania:-
Do you here there, do you here there, for all personnel going on the 10 o’clock tour of Hobart the mini bus left 15 minutes ago!!
sent in by Steve Wright, Chief Engineer, MSV Lochnagar. Shortly after arrving in port,
"All those who havent done so should do so now at the pursers office" you can imagine the chaos.
Sent in by Ben Lazenby
In '98 whilst sailing on RFA GERAINT, the following pipe was made by the Second Mate. "D'ye hear there, Catering staff to the gangway, mince! correction to my last Fruit." Needless to say no one arrived at the gangway. Sent in by James Steer.
A quartermaster who reconned he had served in the burmese navy made a pipe when informed that the ship will be changing to shore power in 5 minutes time.
"Now hear this, the ship will be going ashore in 5 minutes time" sent in by William Meredith
During a very busy Navy Days at Portland on board RFA Engadine, crowded with visitors, the following pipe creased them up!
"D'ye hear there, Chief Fairy report to the flight deck!"
(CPO Fairey RN, was the Senior Flight Maintainer at the time).sent in by Marcus Smith, (CO(X) at the time).
If you have any others please
drop us an E-mail.
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